Here's some quality things to say to a lousy professor (and there are plenty of good professors out there, so I don't want to offend the good ones):

"The class isn't really that dull...just you."

"Can we skip the lecture for a quick game of 'Heads Up Seven Up'?"

"I'd love to stick it out through the rest of class, but I have a life."

"I'd be a foul person too if I had to look at us all day."

"That last lesson you gave us was wonderful. One question. What the Hell were you talking about?"

"I'd hate to be grossly underpaid for my work, does it bother you?"

"I don't mind wasting my time and money on trivial things, why do you think I took this class?"

"Homework? Oh, you must have me confused with, what they call a 'student'."

(This list originally appeared on UncensoredU)